I received this one via email (1/27/2000) ...
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In the wake of the Exxon/Mobil deal and the AOL/Time Warner deal,
here are the latest mergers we can expect to see in the year 2000:

  Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush and W.R. Grace
 Company merge to become Hale Mary Fuller Grace.

  Polygram Records, Warner Brothers and Keebler Crackers merge to become
 Polly-Warner-Cracker.

  3M and Goodyear merge to become MMMGood.

  John Deere and Abitibi-Price merge to become Deere Abi.

  Zippo Manufacturing, Audi Motors, Dofasco and Dakota Mining merge to
 become Zip Audi Do Da.

  Honeywell, Imasco and Home Oil merge to become Honey I'm Home.

  Denison Mines and Alliance and Metal Mining merge to become MineAll Mine.

  Federal Express and UPS merge to become FED UP.

  Xerox and Wurlitzer will merge and begin  manufacturing reproductive
 organs.

  Fairchild Electronics and Honeywell Computers will merge and become
 Fairwell Honeychild.

  3M, J.C. Penney and the Canadian Opera Company will merge and become
 3 Penney Opera.

  Grey Poupon & Dockers Pants will merge and become Poupon Pants.

  Knott's Berry Farm & National Organization of Women will merge and
 become Knott NOW!